Saturday, May 7, 2011

Until We Meet Again, Old Clothes

It made me feel good to write about my cowboy shirt the other night.  Now that it has been written, it shall not be forgotten.  I've just filled a bag with old clothing. I'm not going to photograph it and make it all funzo for the blog.  Best not to glamorize these old rags too much, lest they start to retain some of their original luster.  I'll just say, clothing,  you've served me well.  Until we meet again on the racks of some thrift store (and I re-buy you; this is one of my greatest fears,) clothes I''ll miss you, and now, I'll always remember you.  Here, a tribute to you:

1.  Original Jeggings.  You in no way resemble jeans, and you don't even have any faux pockets. We had a nice run that day at the botanic garden, and I have the pics to prove that you make my legs look a little stuffed sausagey.  You are in no way work appropriate for me, but maybe for someone else, in some other sort of job.  I hope you find that special someone.

2.  Gold studded black spandex leggings.  You are super tight, and I still think you are kind of sexy.  I bought you at Target two years ago, and I've never worn you. There is really nowhere, nowhere to wear you and you don't deserve this.  I trust that you'll find someone who can love you the way you deserve to be loved.  Maybe someone who goes to clubs or something.

3. Patchwork Nightgown.  I ordered you online and you are too big and for me. And if you ever do fit me, trust, I won't want to look at you.  Let's take steps to ensure that will never happen.

4.  Red Old Navy Sweatshirt.   Red Old Navy sweatshirt with an Old Navy 94 logo in big sprawling cursive on your front.   I am pretty sure that I didn't even buy you, maybe I even found you abandoned at a softball field and brought you home with me in our Winnebago and have lovingly cared for you the last 12 years.  You were comfortable, and even so, I don't wear you anymore - just foist you on Alyssa when she decides to spend the night and needs a sweatshirt.  Time to fly, red sweatshirt - may you brighten the life of some other lucky girl.  You should be proud of how long you've lasted, considering I never would have bought you and you have an Old Navy logo on your front.

Ugh, I'm getting bored of this already and the mister is getting pissed at me because I stopped cleaning.

5.  Bye, other stuff.  You don't fit and/or are ugly and/or have holes.  

On with the purging!


No comments:

Post a Comment